Poetry: I hate me


and I hate me the most

every time I realize

I love you.

I would also like to leave you

like you aren’t special to me at all.



I don’t want a new dog.

Let’s all cry a little inside for Hachiko first.

You’re the person whose dog dies and you refuse to get a new one. You’re the one that is like, “I had a dog! My dog was great! I don’t want a new dog!”

I laughed when my friend said this to me, but the joke stayed in my mind. It was funny because it’s true and I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not.

I’ve realized that I am someone who has a hard time moving on. I’m not sure why I am so fixated on the past. My present is wonderful and my future still looks bright, but nothing is as appealing as the idea of going back to my happiness from the past. And while there’s nothing wrong with taking a stroll down memory lane, I always forget that I no longer live there anymore.

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10 Sad Thoughts


I’d like to believe that I am an optimistic person, but the reality is that I’m more pessimistic than most people think. Sometimes, morbid and depressing thoughts just enter my mind and instead of reacting with: Well it doesn’t have to be this way! or Look at the bright side! I just solemnly agree in silence.

What kind of thoughts are these? Well…

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I like it I’m 24

Happy birthday to me, I am 24 now. My next paragraphs may seem like I’m going off on a tangent, but there’s a connecting link – I swear!

Time travel back two years ago, popular kpop artist IU’s hit song was “Twenty-Three”. Her lyrics translated starts with:

I’m twenty three
I’m a riddle
Try to guess the answer

IU released her new album this year with her title track “Palette”. A snippet of her lyrics says this:

I like it I’m twenty five
I know you like me / I know you hate me
Ooh I got this I’m truly fine
I think I know a little bit about myself now

Long story short, this is exactly how I feel.

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Today I don’t like myself – Part II


For Part I – read here.

Sometimes I feel like my biggest life struggle is a never ending mission to like myself.

My life motto is to always strive to be a better person – smarter, kinder – the type of person I want to be best friends with, but every time I think I reach that point, something dark inside me pulls me back and makes me think that I am not smart or kind or good.

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Canada 150: Cross-country train trip in July 2017!


I am a lucky holder of the equivalent-to-a-Willy-Wonka-golden-ticket VIA Rail 150 Youth Pass! Last week, VIA Rail announced a special promotion for Canada’s 150th birthday – unlimited train travel for $150 in July if you’re 12-25 years old*. For context, a 3-zone month bus pass in just Vancouver is almost $200, so I jumped at this deal!

Chaos broke out, their website crashed, people were on VIA Rail’s phone lines for hours, and at the end of 36 hours, over 4,000 Canadian youths will be embarking on a train adventure this summer (and I’m one of them -screams-)!

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2 Week Trial of Adulthood


My parents went on their first ever trip alone this month and because of this, I’ve been doing a lot of “adult” things. By “adult” things I mean stuff like cooking/buying groceries, doing the laundry – stuff you probably already do on a normal basis as a fully-functioning adult.

Reminder: I’m a big baby who doesn’t know how to take care of herself.

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